Thank you to all the people who have been reading my blog. It is lovely to know that it is not sitting in the ether unread.
This week, I thought that I would give you all a break from my story and suggest some great books, as well as other places for support and advice that I have found over the last two years. Please leave comments to post your views on these and to advise of any other books or other places of support worth recommending to myself and all the readers of my blog.
On the left you can see some recommendations. Well I have all three books (and some others).
The first book I purchased was:
Zita West's Guide to Fertility and Assisted Conception
It's a large compendium of all things fertility and infertility. 500 pages and published in 2010, so pretty up to date. I have had it for over a year and read most of it originally, but it is a book I go back to regularly looking for advice and guidance. The first half of the book looks how you can improve your lifestyle to improve your chances of conceiving naturally, whilst the second half looks at fertility issues and Assisted Conception techniques. It's easy to read, she gets expert opinions, so that she gives the best and correct advice and I even found out about Fertility Friends from here!
The only downsides are that it only has a small section on male factor infertility and very little on IUI. Despite this I would still recommend the book. A great reference book for anyone with fertility issues.
Since purchasing this book I have also bought:
Conquering Infertility: Dr. Alice Domar's Mind/Body Guide to Enhancing Fertility and Coping with Infertility by Alice D. Domar
This is a great book that gives you coping strategies. Each chapter is about different areas of your life -relationships, work, family etc. and gives you ways to be able to feel happier with infertility, cope with the stress and appreciate that the way that you are feeling is normal. If you live in London you can do the Alice Domar course at The Bridge Fertility Clinic but if like me you live outside London, then you should definitely give this book space on your bookshelf.
Pink for a Girl by Isla McGuckin
![<em>Pink for a Girl</em> [<em>Book</em>]](http://books.google.com/books?id=P7UTAAAACAAJ&printsec=frontcover&img=1&zoom=1&l=90)
I wouldn't say that this is a must have book but it is a very easy to read book - each chapter is only a couple of pages long. It tells the story of one couples journey through infertility. I found it good to read someone else's journey which I can relate to. What the book does best is to allow you to know that the way you feel is ok as other people with infertility issues are feeling the same.
Making Babies the hard way by Caroline Gallup
This is a very emotional journey of Caroline and Bruce Gallup who find out that they need to use donor sperm to complete their family. It is a great read and for me shows you not only what will happen in IUI treatment but the emotions that they go through are the emotions that all of us will go through. It won't make it easier for you but will make you realise that you are normal. A great read if you have any fertility problems but particularly if you need to use donor sperm. There are not many books written specifically about donor sperm and it is great to find one that is a good read and not a medical textbook.
Other Things:
Fertility Friends Forum
www.fertility friends.co.uk
I have found this a great help since I joined in 2010. The ladies on this website offer support and advice. It has helped me by not having to constantly talk to my husband about infertility and cause arguments but still have somewhere where I can talk and be understood. I think men in general keep more of there emotions hidden, don't need to talk as much as women about issues and have a more practical than emotional approach. Some people on regional threads even meet up (I haven't done this but some people will prefer to have human contact as well as virtual).
The only caution I will give came via a counsellor. Don't get too embroiled as you could be taking on other people's problems to add to your own. I haven't found this an issue. I use it for advice and support and know where to draw the line in my head.
Fertility Show
www.fertilityshow.co.uk
Last year we went to the second Fertility Show at Olympia in London. My husband was very sceptical about going but as a woman wanting to find out as much information as possible I convinced him to tag along. Having been, he says that he would now recommend the show, as he thought it focused his mind on what to do to help our infertility.
There are two sides to the show - seminars and exhibitors. The seminars are excellent. There is a wide choice of ones based on pre treatment, medical issues, treatment, emotional issues, Adoption. We saw four - how to get the most out of the NHS, male factor issues, donor conception, one woman's treatment experience. These were all excellent and we both learnt things from all of them. The seminars alone make the Fertility Show worth attending.
The other side of the show are the exhibitors. We also found out some interesting and useful information from the exhibitors but you need to keep in mind that they are also businesses. Sometimes some of the exhibitors seemed more interested in selling their business and not us. To be fair only the minority of exhibitors came across like this.
I would recommend this show if you have time to visit in November. Get there early and make the most of it because it gets busy later on and you will be queuing to speak to exhibitors. This years show is on 4th and 5th November.
Donor Conception Network
www.donor-conception-network.org
If you are thinking about using donor eggs or sperm then you need to visit this website. They are charity started in 1993 to support people thinking about using a donor, or parents of donor conceived children as well as donor conceived children. I have found the information on this site invaluable.
There are sections for men to read, sections for women, sections for single women and sections for lesbian couples. There is also information for donor conceived children. They have a bookshop and library that members can use. Each year they have a national meeting in London and one national meeting outside of London.
We first came to hear about them at their stand at the Fertility Show last year and we listened to a seminar that Olivia Montuschi from DCN gave on going overseas and using donor sperm or eggs.
Subsequently, we have been to their "Preparation for DC Parenthood Workshop" and found it very useful to discuss issues relating to being a donor conceived parent prior to either making the decision to use donor eggs or sperm or prior to becoming pregnant. It was also great to meet people in a similar position as us. If this something that you are considering to complete your family, then I would highly recommend this workshop. It enabled me to become certain that this was the route we were going down was the right one for ourselves.
We have now joined and been to the National Meeting that they just had in September in Leeds. Again lovely to meet people in a similar position to ourselves but also great to meet people at treatment stage like ourselves but also people who now have donor conceived children. This gave me hope.
This is not the only fertility charity but one worth looking at and joining if you find yourself needing to use donor sperm, eggs or embryos for your family.
This week, I thought that I would give you all a break from my story and suggest some great books, as well as other places for support and advice that I have found over the last two years. Please leave comments to post your views on these and to advise of any other books or other places of support worth recommending to myself and all the readers of my blog.
On the left you can see some recommendations. Well I have all three books (and some others).
The first book I purchased was:
Zita West's Guide to Fertility and Assisted Conception
It's a large compendium of all things fertility and infertility. 500 pages and published in 2010, so pretty up to date. I have had it for over a year and read most of it originally, but it is a book I go back to regularly looking for advice and guidance. The first half of the book looks how you can improve your lifestyle to improve your chances of conceiving naturally, whilst the second half looks at fertility issues and Assisted Conception techniques. It's easy to read, she gets expert opinions, so that she gives the best and correct advice and I even found out about Fertility Friends from here!
The only downsides are that it only has a small section on male factor infertility and very little on IUI. Despite this I would still recommend the book. A great reference book for anyone with fertility issues.
Since purchasing this book I have also bought:
Conquering Infertility: Dr. Alice Domar's Mind/Body Guide to Enhancing Fertility and Coping with Infertility by Alice D. Domar
This is a great book that gives you coping strategies. Each chapter is about different areas of your life -relationships, work, family etc. and gives you ways to be able to feel happier with infertility, cope with the stress and appreciate that the way that you are feeling is normal. If you live in London you can do the Alice Domar course at The Bridge Fertility Clinic but if like me you live outside London, then you should definitely give this book space on your bookshelf.
Pink for a Girl by Isla McGuckin
I wouldn't say that this is a must have book but it is a very easy to read book - each chapter is only a couple of pages long. It tells the story of one couples journey through infertility. I found it good to read someone else's journey which I can relate to. What the book does best is to allow you to know that the way you feel is ok as other people with infertility issues are feeling the same.
Making Babies the hard way by Caroline Gallup
This is a very emotional journey of Caroline and Bruce Gallup who find out that they need to use donor sperm to complete their family. It is a great read and for me shows you not only what will happen in IUI treatment but the emotions that they go through are the emotions that all of us will go through. It won't make it easier for you but will make you realise that you are normal. A great read if you have any fertility problems but particularly if you need to use donor sperm. There are not many books written specifically about donor sperm and it is great to find one that is a good read and not a medical textbook.
Other Things:
Fertility Friends Forum
www.fertility friends.co.uk
I have found this a great help since I joined in 2010. The ladies on this website offer support and advice. It has helped me by not having to constantly talk to my husband about infertility and cause arguments but still have somewhere where I can talk and be understood. I think men in general keep more of there emotions hidden, don't need to talk as much as women about issues and have a more practical than emotional approach. Some people on regional threads even meet up (I haven't done this but some people will prefer to have human contact as well as virtual).
The only caution I will give came via a counsellor. Don't get too embroiled as you could be taking on other people's problems to add to your own. I haven't found this an issue. I use it for advice and support and know where to draw the line in my head.
Fertility Show
www.fertilityshow.co.uk
Last year we went to the second Fertility Show at Olympia in London. My husband was very sceptical about going but as a woman wanting to find out as much information as possible I convinced him to tag along. Having been, he says that he would now recommend the show, as he thought it focused his mind on what to do to help our infertility.
There are two sides to the show - seminars and exhibitors. The seminars are excellent. There is a wide choice of ones based on pre treatment, medical issues, treatment, emotional issues, Adoption. We saw four - how to get the most out of the NHS, male factor issues, donor conception, one woman's treatment experience. These were all excellent and we both learnt things from all of them. The seminars alone make the Fertility Show worth attending.
The other side of the show are the exhibitors. We also found out some interesting and useful information from the exhibitors but you need to keep in mind that they are also businesses. Sometimes some of the exhibitors seemed more interested in selling their business and not us. To be fair only the minority of exhibitors came across like this.
I would recommend this show if you have time to visit in November. Get there early and make the most of it because it gets busy later on and you will be queuing to speak to exhibitors. This years show is on 4th and 5th November.
Donor Conception Network
www.donor-conception-network.org
If you are thinking about using donor eggs or sperm then you need to visit this website. They are charity started in 1993 to support people thinking about using a donor, or parents of donor conceived children as well as donor conceived children. I have found the information on this site invaluable.
There are sections for men to read, sections for women, sections for single women and sections for lesbian couples. There is also information for donor conceived children. They have a bookshop and library that members can use. Each year they have a national meeting in London and one national meeting outside of London.
We first came to hear about them at their stand at the Fertility Show last year and we listened to a seminar that Olivia Montuschi from DCN gave on going overseas and using donor sperm or eggs.
Subsequently, we have been to their "Preparation for DC Parenthood Workshop" and found it very useful to discuss issues relating to being a donor conceived parent prior to either making the decision to use donor eggs or sperm or prior to becoming pregnant. It was also great to meet people in a similar position as us. If this something that you are considering to complete your family, then I would highly recommend this workshop. It enabled me to become certain that this was the route we were going down was the right one for ourselves.
We have now joined and been to the National Meeting that they just had in September in Leeds. Again lovely to meet people in a similar position to ourselves but also great to meet people at treatment stage like ourselves but also people who now have donor conceived children. This gave me hope.
This is not the only fertility charity but one worth looking at and joining if you find yourself needing to use donor sperm, eggs or embryos for your family.
